I can't fully express the feelings I have at my 50th High School Reunion this weekend.  Am I supposed to look back and wonder "what if"  or thank god for where life has landed me.   I find it interesting to see where life has landed some of the kids I grew up with and sad to know that the ones that came to the reunion have a lot of the same feelings I do.  Where did the really poor kids land? 

Oh well, I am glad to know where  I am even if I don't seem to have a clue sometimes.  As I re read the previous paragraph, I realized that I talked about life on terms of landing as if it is more fate than the result of hard work.  On one hand I do accept that luck does play a lot onto what happens to us, but I don't want to minimize the hard work we put into it to get here.  One of the songs we sing has a line, "My memories take me to" and I want to continue to look at the future and not back.

If this seems a little disjointed, it is almost 2 Am and I am typing this in the dark so Barb can sleep. I think it is a lot more of a questions period without the clear ability to provide the answers.  The one thing I don't want it to be is an Oh Poor Me post.  I consider myself to be a darned lucky guy and when I die, I want people to laugh at a lot of the funny silly things we all did together.  If I can't make you laugh at us, I hope you can at least laugh at me.

What makes a good marriage?  One of the girls at our reunion talked about the alcohol fueled decisions that she made right out of school.  She said that she feared that the path she was on was flawed and she made some deliberate steps to change where life took her.  I guess guys always had the Military and girls had maternity.  Here I always thought War was hell but didn't think about the kid of hell others went through.  It is kind of staggering to see the divorce rate of the class of 65. 

Yesterday I met the most beautiful German Shepherd dog.  You could tell that she was getting old as she didn't even bark as strangers came to the door.  I wonder how many of us would love to be like that dog and lay on the cool floor and just watch people come and go.  The only time I felt kind of bad was when she had to get up  and I could tell she hurt like I do when I get in and out of the car.

Oh well, I am going to send this on like I really know the answers.  Oh hell, I am not sure I even know all the quesions after 68 years.


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