They Lie

Yesterday the weatherman posted a forecast for the coming week and the Master Gardener said there are no raindrops on the screen.  I told her that they couldn't make it even one day without an error.  Well, when I got up this morning, it had rained overnight.  Even the wee hours of Saturday should have had raindrops.  I hate it when that happens.   My yard is in need of a good mowing again.  If I drive on it, I leave muddy tracks and skid marks when I turn.   Probably will be Tuesday or Wednesday  before I can get out there.  That means I will have about 6 or 7 acres to mow all together.

I have a nephew in Kansas City that took his daughters and the son of his sister's to Texas.  I am just amazed that anyone would go there with all the rain they have been having.  I guess a lot of people (mom included) worried about me and some of the things I did.   On my way home from Vietnam we drove all through New Mexico, Texas and Oklahoma in a blizzard.  In fact, the roads were closed and I basically broke tracks.  I think we got to Liberal before a Highway Trooper stopped us.  After a delay long enough to eat breakfast, we drove in the ruts of trucks to get to Wichita.   There, we found out that Grandmother Erma had been rushed to the Hospital.  Here's that story -

Erma and Curly lived in a dry county in Arkansas.  They drove to Wichita to greet me as I arrived home.  As soon as they crossed the state line, there are about three liquor stores and they stopped at their favorite watering hole.  I am pretty certain that they bought a six pack of coke and a fifth of Bourbon.   Grandmother fixed them both a drink and off they went to Wichita.  A few miles up the road, Grandfather asked for a second drink and Grandmother again poured.  By the time Curly wanted a third drink, Grandmother said all there was left was coke.  By the time they arrived in Wichita, grandmother was pretty loaded.  He first stop there at 544 Byrd was the bathroom.  After she finished, she stood up, grabbed the back of the stretch pants and pulled up.  That motion caused her to fall forward into the tub where Dad had to go save her.  I am not sure what would have caused my Dad to laugh the most.  The fact that like the punch line to a bad joke he was greeted by Grandma's mooning him or being head down in the tub.  At least the tub was empty and she didn't drown. 

That reminds me of another story from my distant past.   In High School I had a girlfriend that I thought I would like to marry.  At least she had enough sense to keep me refraining from sex so we didn't have to get married.   Her family had been moved by Boeing from Wichita to Seattle and Christmas 1965 I took a bus to go up there and see her.   I can't tell you how depressing the entire time was with the reality that I didn't really love that girl and a week of rain without any sunshine.  It was like my heart didn't know how to put a smile on my face.  On Christmas morning, the sun was out and I walked down the hall to look out the front room window.  As I passed the parent's room, I heard, "Look you can see Mount Rainier"  I glanced that way into the room and there was the mother standing up on the bed completely "starker's" and looking out of the window.   My joke was that I saw the sun and the moon on the same day and that was my Christmas present.   The end of that story was that by noon it was raining again and I didn't see the sun or the moon for the remainder of that trip.  The really good news was that my girlfriend joined the Navy and married the first Swabby that would have her.  

OK, enough of the dark and rainy humor.  I have a good book to read and I'm sure that the beeping from upstairs in breakfast being prepared. 


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