Cowboy Shoes

This post is dedicated to Kansas Cowboy because he wrote a story about one of his Rancher Friends buying a pair of comfortable shoes at Wal*Mart and having trouble keeping his spurs on.
Here's my tale:

It seems that one of the Graduate students at the University in Wyoming decided to do her thesis on the functionality of Cowboy garb. She traveled over to Guernsey and then north to the oldest bar in the west. It has that name because in the 1930's someone imported a bar from England that was a couple of hundred years old and hence the name. I can't remember the name of that damn town but it is the first one north of Guernsey, WY so it can't be hard to find.

When she went into that smoky poorly lit place she saw that the place was almost empty so she asked the bartender/waitress/owner if he knew any cowboys she could interview. He pointed out that down at the end of the bar there was a leathery old guy sitting there nursing a beer and rolling his own cigarettes. She jumped at the chance to interview a real stock man and get his impressions of what a real cowboy would wear and why they wear it.

She ordered a fresh beer for him and asked the fellow about what he was wearing. Most old men sitting at a Bar would always be willing and able to sweet talk with a pretty young college girl. Even the most hard "snake bitten" old wrangler would have told this girl the answer to any question she asked. "How about the hats you guys wear?". "Well" he replied, "Most of us just wear a hat to keep the sun off our heads and the way we roll them up is just a matter of opinion. I wear mine rolled up on the sides some and that seems to funnel the rain just far enough that it don't run down the back of my slicker.

"How about the shirts?" "Well, most of us just but the cheapest shirts we can find and most of them have snaps on the pockets to keep our fixings in when we are working. Them dang store bought cigarettes will fall out of a pocket anytime you jump down off your horse so we have snaps.

"And the belt?" "Well most of us just wear one to keep our pants up. The buckles are memories from our youthful days. If you were good enough to win a buckle for roping or riding you could generally get a few extra dollars a month as a hand worth his pay."

"Your Pants?". "Cheap and durable is the rule. Buy them with the boot cut so you can tuck them in when you are in snake country."

"I notice you aren't wearing boots?" "Hell no, I don' want anyone to think I am a gol danged trucker! "

So from one good old boy that is "all hat and no cattle" I dedicate this little ditty to those fellows out there that make sure there is enough meat so I can have a little taste now and then.


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